At best Cancerians are sensitive, kind and sympathetic, with an absolute urge to nurture and protect people around them. This is most apparent with home and family. So lies the soft side of Cancer, but there is a hard side too, they can be very enterprising, shrewd, and self-assured. When all is in tune Cancerians are intuitive, imaginative and resourceful, knowing instinctively when to reach others and when to withdraw into their protective shell. Cancer has a deep inferiority complex, any hurt (both real and imagined), is brooded upon at length. Cancerians tend to look back at, and hold on to things from the past, they can be very possessive. They are inherently conservative in their outlook, but this does not get in the way of initiating change where they deem necessary.

I certainly agree with the general description of cancerians I can find online. Not because they have good things to say, but about how the good are often hidden away in the "shell", and how I would personally react to situations. I love the people I love, protecting them is just part of loving them, it's a natural instinct. Like how a crab's mostly hard on the outside, I like to appear tough, impenetrable. I know you might think it's a guy-thing, it might be, but I believe it's because I simply don't like to look weak. As much as I want to protect the people I love, I have to protect myself first. And because of all these self-protecting, I lose the impression friends and family around me has. I become obnoxious, shrewd and loud. I didn't realise that I can be such a jerk until lately.

Others deal with problems when they come, I imagine them, and then brood and dwell all over them till the point I get lost in the real world. I always thought my courage to speak is admirable, but speaking is just what's on the outside. Courage is nothing when there's not a reason backing it. It then becomes stupid. I'm afraid to feel. I usually don't dare to face emotions, I suppress them. I think before showing my anger and sorrow. And even if I do show them, they are all well thought out in my head prior to any drama. I'm quite a wuss regarding this.

It seems like I'm going through quite an emotional turmoil lately, I guess I am, or maybe I'm just using a blog for how it's meant to be used. I have more to say, but because it's running kinda late, and that I'm actually chatting with an old friend on MSN, I'm stopping here and hiding back into the shell.